Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes we have our
reasons, but other times we hold our truths and reasons on the inside. First
thing’s first, Men, when we see that girl we want, do we have a goal we’re trying
to accomplish? I believe I had mentioned in a previous blog that we must set
ourselves with a goal and plan to be with someone. Why are we not thinking on
long-term affects? What will things be like 2 years from now? Incase you didn’t
realize, females WILL see the long terms. They think they’re the right one, and
the only one. Don’t forget that!!!
The one thing that really concerns me about a relationship
is when couples get out of a “Great” relationship and end up with someone else
in a heartbeat. We all call them “Rebounds”
A rebound is someone who you
date/go out with to keep yourself busy and you use him/her to keep your mind
off your ex who you still have feelings for.
Dear Ladies, how exactly can we go from a great
relationship, to a break-up, and then on to another relationship in less than a
month? I have seen great relationships that had potential, and by potential
I mean there was a great foundation and chemistry between the two partners. I
also have witness and talked to ladies going through their grieving heartache
process and say “Right now I don’t want to end up with anyone else, I want to focus on
me, school, and other things in my future”. Ladies,
It’s great that you make the promise to yourself, but you have to realize that
if you broke up with someone you have been with for at least a year plus, how
exactly do you get over someone you had a lot of great memories with just that
quick? Now I understand that we must quickly move on, but how quickly do we
actually need to move on? Men this can also apply to you as well. But before I
go on to another subject, I want to say that you have to fully allow yourself
to heal completely. Sure there’s always someone who is willing to take your
[ex] partner’s last place and fill in the gaps that he/she hasn’t done, but
sometimes it may not always be what you think. Another point that ties in to
this is applying meaningful words and actions. On the other hand, don’t say
things you have said in a previous relationship and say it again in the next
one.
For example,
“I am so happy to have you in my life, I couldn’t have been more
thankful”
“You are the best
person I can’t live without”
“You are beautiful
and the only one with a key to my heart”
Stuff like that can make us [men or women] look bad on two
different levels. Now I understand that perhaps you may have had a bad
[previous] relationship, but realize that we’re all humans, we all make
mistakes, and we’re all not the same people. I understand that if one chapter
closes another one opens. But, we have
to think broadly of our decisions and the choices we make that betters’
ourselves, and environment.
I can tell you one thing….If you have ever been deeply in
love with someone or in a relationship where it was close enough to become a
marriage, and y’all two ever brake up, I can honestly say it takes a very long
time to get over that person. Maybe that’s just me and everyone has a different
way of looking at their situations. But as oppose to a break-up, if that person
has done everything for you, willing to fix a lot, and keep the relationship
going, there is absolutely no reason as to why you want to break-up. Don’t
throw away a precious jewel.
Remember to set a goal, and determine your reasons for
everything. When you heal, venture out, but remember every person you meet has
and will impact your life in some sort of way. Refer back to my old blog “Going Through A
Break-Up”. And always remember that you should never rebound to another
relationship just to get over the heartbreak. If someone does ever comes along
and try to take his/her place, I would always give it some time. Keep him/her
near and dear, but don’t act so quickly.
Now men, I know sometimes you want the girl you want, but PLEASE don’t
lie to the girl and say stuff in the beginning and not show it. You should take
all you can and raise the bar and standards up a few levels…I’ll talk about
that on another blog. But in the mean time, continue to do great in all things,
and think smart when it comes to relationship decisions.
Twitter: @RonaldAtkinson9
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