Thursday, January 22, 2015

Sexual Bullying and STDs

Living in a sexualized society as a college student, I think it’s critical to know our every little move, every word we speak, and everyone who is around us. When I have spoken to a lot of anonymous college students, one of the issues that they had always faced was getting an STD due to having unprotected sex.  As I sat down talking about it with other students, I told them that sometimes, it’s not always “your” fault.
            There are over 65 million Americans who have an STD. Statistics show that one in six people have it and also not even know about it. My deal with this issue is, how can we comfort them? How can we crack down on issues such as these?

It’s tough if you live with an STD, especially if there isn’t a cure. People will go through questions such as

            How will I tell my partner, parents, and friends?
            What will my friends think?
            Is it treatable, and how much will it have to cost anything if it is?
Another question that people ask themselves is, will these symptoms be a cause of death?

            Speaking for the college students I have talked to, it’s never easy to talk to someone about having an STD. Many people actually avoid it at all cost, go out and have sex, and THEN tell their partner “Oh I have an STD”. Where does that leave the person who didn’t have one before the session? Scared. Ashamed. Lied to. Betrayed. Slut. All of those words are now written on their faces.
            It goes back to schools that fail to teach the young adults about the true facts of sex education. Yes, we teach about puberty in elementary school. We also teach about STD, AIDS, and HIV in Middle and High School. But it’s the action in between that we fail to teach. For example, the psychological and physicality of a person. The dangers of rape, and the sexualized society of the real world. That’s where it fails. And with the many struggles teenagers and young adults go through, it’s very important to have conversations like those.
           
            Many of the students who I’ve spoken to are afraid to come out of their shell. It’s never easy, and the worst case of it all, is that now they are dealing with rumors and words that are cutting deep within them, in which they have to face. Those words and wounds will never heal until an action is to be taken place. We have to be aware of people living with an STD for the rest of their lives. Too many of us are quick to play the name game in judging others, that we’re also cutting their wounds deeper. We already know what bullying can do, but we also need to know what sexual bullying can do. If you know anyone that’s dealing with having an STD, let them know that they’re still apart of a beautiful world. Sometimes, they’re afraid to speak it up, so we should always be there for them in the hard times they are facing.

My Tips:
Before having sex, ask that person their background, or tell them that you’ve had unprotected sex with someone before YOU KNEW you were positive. Its not easy, but better safe than sorry. If they do react, understand that it’s out of your control. Don’t be surprised if you get rejected, but hope that whoever your partner is, you can work things out.

Being Rejected: That’s the biggest reason why victims never want to tell their families and friends. ALWAYS find someone you know who cares about you, to help you out. Never cheat your way out of love and support. Because, the more you run away from love and support, the more you would want it. People will always see you when you’re at your weakest, so it will always be best to open up when they are there to help

Know that you’ll never lose your job because you have AIDS, HIV, or an STD, however, LET YOUR SUPERVISOR KNOW. It is much easier for you to let him/her know, so that you can make doctor’s appointments and fulfill other health issues. Supervisors, keep it 100% confidential.

Always take care of yourself. Know what the STD is and how it’s treatable. Know the symptoms. Even if you don’t show any signs, always research everything and how you  can/can’t transmit it to another partner.

USE PROTECTION, REGARDLESS!! Always use protection. Even if you know you aren’t showing any signs or symptoms, you need to better protect yourself. Especially if it’s with someone you don’t know their history with. They may not tell you that they have an STD, but it’s great to be smart first.

Consult Third Party Options. If you know you’re facing a difficult situation, please contact a support group. If there isn’t any support groups, start one with other people who are living with the same problems. Please contact

Last but not least, enjoy life. Now that you have found out if you’re positive, don’t think that your sex life is over. Yes, you will deal with the fact that you have an STD, but the good thing about is now that you are positive, you’re beginning to find purpose. You feel happier because you have more freedom and less pressure of anxiety. Always think POSITIVE thoughts and NEVER worry about what others say. If you’re comfortable about life and happy that your whole world isn’t shattered, you’re moving in the right direction.

 If someone is suffering, be there for them. Never joke about STD. If so, you’ll never know if you will become the next victim.


Ronald Atkinson

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