Bosses, Snakes, and CEOs of Business

Sometimes, we all have a tendency to sit back, watch, and judge others as people walk by.  I know in most cases, it’s never our job to judge others and criticize for what they do. But what about judging others for who they are? Imagine you’re working for a company in which you have been employed for over six years. Everyone around you seems to like what you’ve done for the company, so the more you move up into a higher position, the more they would love to work for you. Now, say it’s been seven years, and you’re still working for the same boss who employed you seven years ago. He has never complimented on your hard work and effort, but he’s always complimented on other people’s work. Does it throw you off just a tad bit?

             Perhaps you’re thinking of new ways to expand business, or you’re asking for a raise, so you begin to set up an appointment to try to go into his office to make negotiations. Sooner or later, you’re standing right outside the CEO’s office trying to negotiate with him. You knock on his door, and your boss opens it up. But as soon as he opens the door, he pokes his head out and looks left, right, and then towards you, but not at you.  

            “What can I do?” he says, walking back to his desk. Noticed how he never greeted you? No welcome. No Smile. But let’s proceed.

            You sit down in the chair located at the front of his desk and begin discussing about what you’re willing to negotiate with him about. You’re hoping he will acknowledge what you’re speaking, but instead, he cuts you off and claims that now is not the right time. Now stop right there. You’re calm, and you’re sitting down watching his every move and realize that he doesn’t want to be bothered by your presence. Your boss is acting as if he’s in a hurry to do other things, but you know his schedule says “Office hours” at the time you’re meeting with him. He’s antsy. He’s too busy going through stacks of files and papers on the desk. So then you start to wonder about the scenario, his words and actions, and his eye contact. Notice when you’re speaking to him, he doesn’t return any full eye contact but only once or twice for three seconds? The boss looks down at his desk and then gives his full attention to his computer. Once again he says, “Can we schedule this some other time, I’m expecting someone.”.

            You look around and you notice that nobody is even sitting outside of his door, so you also begin to think, why not give at least five minutes of your time to converse with me until that person shows up? Silently you’re thinking. You didn’t want to argue, so you respect his offer and walked out of his office. Hmmm…Something didn’t seem too right about this situation.

            The point I’m trying to make is this. In the business world, whether you are working for someone or with someone, you should always watch how people act in your presence. You should always read someone for their character and who they are. Sometimes, they are snakes. A snake is someone who is too much of a coward to own up to your potential, as well as their own potential. They are there to see you fail. They love giving others who aren’t in need, great opportunities. Getting rid of the common good people and replacing them with someone who offers a joyous friendship that lack the skills needed. What you also have to realize is this. When a snake is placed in a position of power, the snake’s venom can spread like wildfire. The first bad thing that happens is like the teeth sinking in the flesh. Once the venom shoots out, it spreads, and then more and more bad things will happen inside the business. 

            When you’re working with someone who might be a snake, don’t just watch their actions or hear what they speak, but look deeply into their eyes. Like reptile snakes that like to move around, human snakes are also the same way. When you catch them in their comfort zone, they get antsy. Now watch their eye contact. If they can’t seem to make eye contact with you, they are never to be trusted. In the business world, if you’re willing to attract others around you and gain good partners with someone, ALWAYS make eye contact. You can tell a lot by someone who uses eye contact. If you’re engaging in them, but they don’t engage in return, something’s fishy.

@RonaldAtkinson9

Jumping into conclusions of Relationships and Break-ups

            I remember back in my teenage years where I had a crush on a female, or perhaps females, since I had more than one crush during the time period, and I thought to myself, will I ever have a chance with her? I always thought I would pull it off, slowly but surely. Getting to know them, writing notes, and engage personally. However, in those years, you had to get inside of their mind. You had to study their actions within the school, outside the school and even who they would hang out with. In those days, there wasn’t social media. Sure there was Windows Live, Bebo, Xanga, Flickr, Yahoo Messenger and MSN, but we rarely ever saw their “Personal life” on the internet. A lot of the time, it would be Just photos, thoughts and interests. Before Facebook came out, there was MySpace. I wasn’t even allowed to have a MySpace page, but I snuck and got one anyway. However, with MySpace, you would see so much. It was like entering in the world of a person’s diary. Statuses, Pictures, Conversations, and even their mood. 

            At one point of time, I had a crush on a girl name Kaitlyn. If I was ever on MySpace, I would often find myself scrolling down my message feed and out of nowhere, I would see Kaitlyn constantly change her mood from hopeful to heart-broken. From heart-broken, to worried. Then, I would see her write statuses such as, “How can you crush a girl’s heart that is so delicate?”. When I saw that, I knew for fact that she was having relationship issues. So what did I do? I messaged her. I asked “Are you doing alright? Are you okay?”. She would write back in a message so vague “I’m doing fine, thank you. How are you?”. So when I saw that, I was like, “I understand that you’re having relationship issues, but just to let you know, I’m already here if you need anything.” Then, she would write back saying “Thanks!”

            Usually, our conversations were extremely vague. She wouldn’t open up to anyone (Me), unless it was her close friends. But I can tell you where my mistake came from. A week before this whole issue, I had written her a note saying how talented, beautiful and how nice she was as a person. Then, I went into writing about asking her to the homecoming dance. I gave her the note the night of a Friday night football game. Never heard from her until the next day and I can tell she had shared it to her friends. Anyway, she wrote back saying “It was nice. But I’m already going to the dance with Alex.”

            I wasn’t too heartbroken, but as that week went on, I just kept seeing relationship drama all on my MySpace. Not drama as in arguing, but drama as in depressing statuses. So here I am thinking to myself, “HELLO!!! DO YOU NOT SEE ME?” I was trying hard to win her love, but to win her sense of connection and understanding. Anyways, the relationship had ended. I said YES!!! Now is my chance. Come to find out, it was an off and on relationship type deal. That’s when I said….”Screw it. I’m moving on”. Eventually, as time has moved forward, I began to realize many lessons in the “Relationship World”. Even with crushes after Kaitlyn, I still had the problem of jumping into conclusion after a break-up happens.

            One of the things we forget about is Time. When a break-up happens, that person needs time to heal. We can’t just think that once a break-up happens, doesn’t mean they have not healed from a broken heart. Especially, if it was a relationship that lasted at least 3 years.

            Two, Keep Life and Social Media separate from the truth. Just because two people are going out, doesn’t mean they HAVE to show their relationship to the public. Yes it’s nice to let people know that they’re in a relationship, but to have a million statuses about their partner and pictures could sometimes go overboard. With that in mind, we also assume that just because couples doesn’t have their profile pictures set to where their partners aren’t in it, doesn’t mean they are single. Just because their relationship status isn’t “Facebook Official” doesn’t mean that the person is single too. We have to agree that couples do things differently and sometimes they don’t want to bother about putting too much personal relationship business on the web for people to see.  We can’t based are assumptions over social media. There are numerous people that I know who have been in great relationships, but choose not to expose it over the web.

            Three, going back to when I said the person needs to heal, we have to understand that we don’t know how the last person has effected their personal life.  Sometimes when we fall for someone, we forget how much THEIR ex has made an impact on their life. Usually past relationships can create an impact whether you want to build from it, or break away. Nowadays, if I ever have a crush on someone who is in a relationship, and I had found out that they went through a break-up, my job would to not jump in and get a chance, but rather let them reevaluate their past relationship. Why didn’t it work? Is it too late to fix it? Because, their focus is to figure out what they know was right for them. Can they move forward, or will they give up? Perhaps they potentially saw a marriage happening. You just never know what thoughts are going through their mind after a break-up. Personally, I think one of the biggest fears when falling for someone is, if you do get a chance of becoming the NEXT person in line, will they still love their ex? And quite frankly, my job isn’t about being the next guy in line, but to simply make sure that the female will never give up on Life, Love and herself. Even if I was to be her “Next”, I think things from the past and present will conflict a lot of emotions.

 Ronald Atkinson

Making "Relationship" Investments.

I often tell my readers, listeners, friends, and followers, to begin making investments when finding a partner.  There are two ways to make investments, and that’s mentally and socially.

Mentally: The Art of Investing in others begins in the mind. Before you engage yourself to someone, you begin to think. When you’re thinking, you’re not finding if they’re dateable, but if they have the potential to be the person you have been looking for. In other terms, personality and looks. With that in mind, you’re not fully being in that person’s presence, but you are still at a place in which you can notice them from a distance. Such as, you see that person every single day at the coffee shop, or you begin to pick up personality traits in what he/she does. Either way, your mental thoughts are often up to your judgment. You make the call. Now don’t put things to the test yet. Don’t call it quits. You’re still wondering about that person. You are still trying to want to know more about this person.

How unique are they?

What is it about that person that makes them do such and such?

Perhaps something you see will spark an interest.

Now it’s time to put things up to the test.

Socially Investing: This is where all of your mental notes come in affect. You don’t want to spill the beans just yet, but you also want to come into a conclusion with your thoughts. This is where you want to talk to that person. This is the time where you engage in a conversation, “The Getting to know you phase”. You now have a choice to find the answers that you always wanted to know more about, from this person. Don’t pressure yourself. You’re not trying to start a romantic date yet, but you are still wanting to get to know that person beyond what the eyes can see. This is where you use your eyes, ears, mouth, nose, and touch. Be around that person not just to talk, but to see how he acts in the real world.

Investing in others is all about using your best judgment in order to find your match. Match in a relationship? Not always, but perhaps a match of similar personalities. What is it that the other person has, that might be something you’ve always wanted? You never know.

             If that person plays hard to get, you have to ask yourself “If I really want this person, how will I step my game up?”

            What’s the price you have to pay in the future?

Start making those investments. Start getting along with others so that other interested people can see your personality, and love you for who you are.

Morning Thoughts: Dealing With Negativity.

In my last blog, I talked about Encouragement. As of 7:00am, Monday Morning, I woke up this morning still feeling angry at some things. As I looked about the sun shining through my window, I realized that it was a brand new day. As I went about on my morning blogging routine, I took one look into my e-mail inbox and noticed the e-mails that contained “negativity”. What exactly did I do? Simple deleted them so I wouldn’t have to worry about it. Why is that? Because, any negativity that comes towards you, will simply become a part of you. When it’s a part of you, it will consume you to bring it down even more.  So I took my one step out of bed, prayed a “Prayer for Guidance” In which Joyce Meyer wrote on her Facebook…

           

            "Holy Spirit, come dwell in me fully and completely. I know that I cannot change things on my own. I'm open and sensitive to Your promptings and sincerely invite You to get involved in every area of my life. Thank You, Holy Spirit, for comforting me, strengthening me, counseling me, standing by me and helping me with everything that I face and go through. I want you to be my chief Counselor, my main Teacher. I want You to lead me and guide me. I allow You to take charge and remain with me forever. Amen."

After that was said and done, I prayed for others out of encouragement and love. Simply because as Christians, it’s the right thing to do. After I came back from my first class, I thought about all of the other people who don’t have a “Faithful” connection. What did I do? I simply prayed for them. Then I thought to myself, if you continue to dwell on the negative, you will receive negative results. If others who persecute you continue to think negative about you, they will get negative results.

What I’m trying to say is this, “Negativity” is like e-mail. Remove and delete the junk, or else, it will control your mind, body, and spirit. Continue to pray for guidance, healing, and comfort, and always remember that you’re a conquer with the anointing of the most high God.  Negative is like one small single cell. If you dwell on that tiny cell, it will just continue to grow. Once it grows, you will feed from it. With that said, it will keep you from finding the positive cells in the situation that you’re in. Always find the smallest positive cell, grow from it, encourage it, and use your FAITH, to expect the positive outcomes.

Amen, and God Bless!!

Ronald Atkinson

Night thoughts: Encouragement and Judgmental Correction

We all have the need to be "Perfect". We all feel that we have to live up to other's expectations of perfection. Regardless of time, effort, practices, and so on, we all work hard at something. But no matter how hard we work, we can still be beaten down as if, we're not good enough. What ever happened to encouragement? Too often, we either find ourselves judgmental, or surround ourselves who are very judgmental. In order to increase encouragement so that we can strive for a positive outcome, it all has to do it with love. If we encourage more, it will build them up. If we judge, yet hammer others out of correction, it will bring them down. And with that, you will not receive the perfection you need. There's a difference between "Encouragement" and "Judgmental correction", and it all has to deal with Love, and faith. 



Goodnight, and May God Bless You.

Trust & Loyalty

I don’t know why men get overly upset when they see their girl socially talking to someone else. But then again, it goes for women. Women don’t like it when their man is caught seen with other ladies talking to them, or at least to where ladies are flirting with him.

I felt the need to write this blog to set something straight. Last week on Friday night, I was in Aggieville for the first time since May. Apparently, I like to go to hang out, chill, and enjoy myself with friends. I don’t go to get wasted, and I definitely don’t go just to pick me up a chick. Anyways, I walked inside of one of the bars just right about thirty minutes to closing time, and my friends just sat and chilled. While they ordered their drinks, they decided to go out and get something to eat. With the Varsity Truck in the back Alley, and a Pita Pit down the block, they dispersed, I stayed. While I was staying, I had a small conversation with a female sitting next to me. We were talking about something, and she decided to ask questions about the topic she was talking about.  Anyway, at no point was I flirting, or even THINKING about this girl during the moment. To be honest, I was more engaged in the conversation. However, this other random guy seemed to be upset when we were talking. With that said, he said, “sir, I’m going to need you leave, and you [the girl] sit over there”. Okay, I can understand that it was closing time, and you needed to get some work done, but if you’re upset and didn’t want me talking to her, you could’ve said so. Respectfully, I just walked out without putting up a fight. Now to be honest, I don’t know if that was her boyfriend, brother, cousin, whoever it was, I can assure you that knowing how Aggieville can be, sometimes you just have to protect those you know from strangers. But this blog isn’t about the situation, but more so on the words “Loyalty” and “Trust”.

Ladies and Gentlemen, know that each and everyone of you is a unique individual. As human beings, we will always have those who are “interested” in us. We will always have fans, friends, and of course anyone who will come into our lives. The problem is, we let jealousy get the best of us. When we go out with someone, we feel the entitlement of keeping that person guarded from being free into his/her own world. Yes, we have the urge to tell them what they can, or cannot do. We also have a say to make up all these rules. Anyhow, often times, we don’t like to see our loved ones talking to others, flirting, or at least be somewhere when we are not present. We also don’t like to see our partners text anyone else in their phone, like pictures, comment on their tweets, photos, etc.. so we feel the need to monitor them. Technically, my girl could be hiding secrets from me that I DON’T know about, but here’s where it comes down to.

A Relationship is built on “Trust”. If you begin your relationship, you’re committing to trust each other at every step, every second, and in every way in life.  I’m not that type of guy that’s going to monitor my girl, or interfere with who she lets enter in her life, talks to at a hang out place, or whatever…I will not get super defensive in fighting someone just because that person thinks she’s beautiful. All I’m saying is, it’s something that we have to deal with everyday. But my focus isn’t that person, or the situation. Instead, my focus is on the girl who I am with. Yes, there could be others who are beyond greater than I am and perhaps trying to get with them, but if my girl can standup for herself, and resist temptation of flirting with other people, and even perhaps stop the situation, that’s all that matters. It’s the ultimate test of how us men should look at. If she can fight for herself, and say “sorry, I have a man”, or “ Excuse me, but I am beautiful only for my man”, then obviously, she passed the test.

I didn’t write the the meat of the blog, because there’s many things that can happen in any situation, but all I’m saying is, Trust is within your partner. If you can Trust them that they will be loyal to their self, and you, then perhaps, you can take the worry off your shoulders. Relax, go out, have fun. To be honest, if anyone tries to talk to your partner, or seems interested in them, take into consideration that you have someone great by your side.

Life is full of temptations, so the best way to fight them off, is you. Anyone else can only peer pressure you to do something.

Ronald Atkinson